Heart's Desire
by mrsyt31
Summary: PLOT BUNNY CONTEST ENTRY...They call it hero worship. What do they know? Nothing. In a way, Edward Cullen saved my life, and I haven't been able to get him out of my head ever since.
1. Chapter 1

**ENTRY FOR THE PLOT BUNNY CONTEST**

**Story Name: Heart's Desire**

**Penname: mrsyt31**

**Rating: M**

**Word Count(not including header/author's note): 2962**

**To see other entries in the Plot Bunny Contest, please visit the following C2:**

**http:/www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/community/Plot_Bunny_Contest/82048/**

**Story prompt:  
"Hero worship," they called it.  
What do they know? Nothing.  
Edward Cullen saved my life, and I have been unable to get him out of my mind ever since.  
It was just one of those things. Right place, at the right time. Well, for him, anyway.  
I'd been attracted to him ever since I started school in Forks. I'm normally never a klutz, but whenever I see him, I seem to always fall over myself. It sucks, because I want to be calm, and cool, and collected - like he always is.  
He's always been friendly to me - to everyone, really - smiling, asking how I'm doing. Well, he asks if I'm okay. Same thing, right?  
He has the gymlocker two doors down from mine, and as we're getting dressed after class, I over hear the one thing that makes my heart drop to my stomach.**

**Thanks to ICMezzo for stepping in to beta this for me. I owe you big, girl!...**

...

Edward Cullen saved my life. Okay, well, maybe not so much, but it sure feels like it. He is everything I wish I were; beautiful, charming, charismatic, and friendly. In fact, he is always so nice to everyone that I shouldn't have been surprised that he came to my aid.

I have been harboring a crush on him since the first day I arrived at Forks High School six months ago. It is now the middle of March, and as far as I know, I wasn't even on his radar until about two weeks ago. That was the day that he happened upon me in the library as I was being harassed by a couple of jocks.

I've never really tried to fit in here at Forks High, so after a while I was labeled as a geek. That's when the wolves descended. Everywhere I went, they were there to trip me or shove me in to a locker. Thank god for Edward. If it weren't for him that day...well, who knows what would have happened.

They call it hero worship. What do they know? Nothing. In a way, Edward Cullen saved my life, and I haven't been able to get him out of my head ever since.

*~*~R~*~*

It has been two weeks since the incident and ever since Edward has gone out of his way to take me under his wing.

I've never considered myself a clumsy person, but around Edward I can not control my body. I've tripped over backpacks and books, bumped in to desks, and fallen over a couple of chairs. It seems sometimes that I am in more danger from myself than I ever was from those meatheads that used to torture me. Yet regardless of my inability to be calm, cool, and collected around him, he has brought me in to his life. He has introduced me to his friends, invited me to sit with them at lunch, and has started driving me to and from school everyday because I don't have a car of my own.

I'm not stupid, though. I see the way his other friends look at me. I know that his best friend Jasper has seen the way I look at Edward and I wonder if he understands the emotion displayed on my face. Something tells me that Jasper can read me like a book and if I'm not more careful about masking my feelings, my secret will be revealed. I don't know whether Edward is gay or not, but I won't take the chance of losing the first real friend I've made here by exposing myself to him.

Hell, even if I find out that he is I'm not sure I'd risk it. I can be his friend and admire him from a distance. My only fear is that someday I'll have to watch as he falls for somebody who is not me.

*~*~R~*~*

It is finally Friday and I have once again made it through the humiliation that is gym class. Edward's gym locker is just two down from mine, so I don't linger and head right to the shower. When I am finished, I head back to my locker, but before I can round the corner I hear them talking.

"You have to have noticed how he looks at you Ed... It's like he wants to eat you, or something."

I hear Edward sigh before he responds. "It's not like that Jasper. He's a nice guy who needs a break. I like him, I really do. But that's as far as it goes. We're just friends."

My heart breaks a little at his words. I guess I already knew on some level that he felt this way. I mean, why on earth would he ever want me? But it is the words that follow that make my heart drop to my stomach.

"I asked Bella to the dance," he mutters. "She said yes."

"That's good, right?" Jasper asks. "The four of us can double; it'll be fun!"

This day was bound to come, but it isn't any easier knowing his preference for Bella. I realize that I can't continue to stand here dripping wet in my towel, so I take a deep breath and duck my head as I make my way to my locker.

"Hey, Ri," Edward greets me. "You going to the dance next weekend?"

"Nah," I reply, shaking my head while I try and catch my breath. "Not really my thing."

Jasper claps me on the back before he leaves the room. "Too bad, man. It's gonna be a good time!"

Edward and I are alone now, everyone else having rushed out to start their weekend. I can sense him moving slowly toward me and it takes every ounce of control I have to hold back the tears that are burning the backs of my eyes.

"You sure you don't want to go? We could all go together," he murmurs as I pull my jeans on over my briefs. I feel his eyes on me, but they never leave my face. It makes me sad. He'll never see the real me; the boy who wants to love him and hold him and make him smile every day of forever. He'll never know how much it hurts me that none of that will ever happen.

I raise my eyes to meet his and for a moment I think he must see something there, because the pain in his beautiful green eyes almost matches my own.

"Seriously," he says. "If you change your mind, just let me know, okay? It would be really cool if you came with us."

"I'll think about it," I mumble as I look away, fearing that my control is slipping.

*~*~R~*~*

I watch and listen throughout the week as everyone makes plans for tonight's dance. It has become more difficult to hide my emotions, especially when I have to listen to Bella and Alice constantly talking about what they are going to wear and where they will have dinner. It is only a small consolation that Edward doesn't seem quite as enthusiastic as everyone else.

And as always, I watch him.

And Jasper watches me watch him.

When did my life become so complicated?

I suppose it doesn't even really matter, because I would not trade this last month for anything. And even though I know that Edward will be dancing with his arms around Bella tonight, I can't help but wish that it were me there with him instead.

As I leave school after my last class of the day, I see Edward waiting for me at his car. This has become our routine. But as much as I love spending the time with him, it tortures me. It eats at me to be so close and not be able to reach out and touch him the way I want, and I end up overwhelmed with emotions whenever we are together.

"Please say you'll change your mind about tonight," he pleads. "It won't be the same without you and I can't stand the thought of you at home by yourself while I'm at the dance with everyone else."

I walk around to the passenger side and open the door, pausing before I slide in to the seat. When Edward finally joins me in the car, I turn to him and open my mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. We stare at each other for a moment before I finally find words.

"I don't dance, Edward," I mumble. "I'll just feel out of place while everyone else has a good time. Besides, I'm not really feeling that great; I should probably just get some rest."

Silence fills the car a second time as Edward contemplates my response.

When he finally turns to look at me again, I meet his gaze and am shocked to see the look of hurt and frusration on his face.

"Did I do something, Riley? Because...well, you've been acting weird this past week or so. I know we haven't been friends all that long, but I'm usually pretty good at reading people."

I sigh, letting my shoulders slump in defeat. "You haven't done anything wrong, Edward. I just...I guess I'm not really feeling like myself lately." The last things I want are to hurt him or let on how I really feel for him. "I'm not mad at you, I swear," I emphasize.

We begin the drive back to my house, which never takes quite as long as I would like. When he pulls in to my driveway, it feels as though there are a thousand miles between us and I begin to doubt whether I'll ever really be okay with being just his friend.

"Thanks again for the ride," I mutter as I glance at him from the corner of my eyes. He's watching me again and my breath hitches in my throat as I see the same look of hurt on his face that was present there earlier.

"Maybe we can do something this weekend," he says earnestly.

"Sure," I reply. "Just call me tomorrow, 'kay?"

"Okay. Just...if you change your mind, you know, about the dance? Well, just text me or whatever. It really would be cool if you were there."

Knowing that this is an impossibility, I simply nod and exit the car.

I watch as he drives away, wondering why on Earth he's so adamant that I show up at the dance.

*~*~R~*~*

Even I'm not sure how I ended up here. I must have snapped or something, because I know without a doubt that I hate school dances. But something in the way Edward spoke to me this afternoon made me curious. Maybe he feels something for me. Probably not, but I am compelled to find out what his agenda is anyway.

I check myself one more time, ensuring that my buttons are done right and that my tie is straight, before I enter the gym. My blood is pounding in my ears and I'm sort of dizzy, like I might pass out. I don't think I've ever been so nervous in my life.

Letting my gaze wander around the dark room, I spot Jasper and Alice talking in the corner. Behind them and to the left are Bella and Edward. His arms are wrapped around her and he's smiling. Meanwhile I feel like my chest is about to burst from the ache spreading quickly through my body.

He glances up at that moment, meeting my eyes from across the room. He raises his hand to wave, but simultaneously Bella reaches up to kiss his cheek. The sight sends me running from the room.

I shouldn't have come. Why did I come? Because he asked me to. Shit, this sucks.

There has never really been any question about Edward's feelings, but for some reason I had let myself believe that he might want me anyway.

Stupid, stupid Riley.

Thankful that I was able to borrow my mom's car, I head across the parking lot. I've nearly reached my destination when I hear him calling me.

"Riley! Riley, wait!" His footsteps echo across the pavement as he races to catch up to me. "Where are you going? Riley?"

Coming to an abrupt halt, I try to catch my breath as he approaches. When I hear him come to a stop behind me, I turn around, but can not look at him.

"I shouldn't have come," I whisper.

"Why not?"

Still looking at the ground, I shrug my shoulders and sigh. "I just...I can't watch you with her," I reply, being totally honest with him for the first time. "It hurts too much."

He takes the three steps forward that close the distance between us. "Riley, please look at me."

The sound of his voice breaks my heart. Now he knows and it may mean the end of my time with him. "Can we go somewhere?" he asks.

I look up at him, confused as to why he wants to go anywhere with me now. "Sure, I guess...if you're sure you want to."

"Please," he replies.

And then we are cruising down the highway, headed for the beaches at La Push. We came here together once before accompanied by the rest of Edward's circle of friends. It looks much different at night and I suddenly remember that Edward left his date back at the high school. "How will Bella get home?" I ask.

"Alice and Jasper said they would drive her home," he answers as he pulls into the beach parking lot. He gets out of the car and starts toward the trail leading down to the shore.

Following his lead, I trudge along, wondering how I am going to explain my behavior. I don't have to wonder for long.

As we reach the water's edge, Edward turns to face me. "You said it hurts you to see me with Bella. What does that mean?"

My body is trembling with nervous anxiety when I answer him. "It means...it hurts here," I say, placing my hand over my heart. "I never wanted you to know, especially now when you're starting something with her. I just couldn't be there watching the two of you together. You both looked so happy."

The words are spilling out of me now and I wish I had some sort of verbal filter. But of course I don't, so without thinking, I add, "I've wanted you for...well, for a while now. I never thought in a million years that we would ever even be friends."

He stares at me blankly for what seems like forever before I see realization wash over his face. Surprisingly, he doesn't look angry or disgusted; he almost looks...relieved.

"You want me," he murmers.

"Yes."

"Since when?" he asks, cocking his head to one side as he ponders my expression.

I'm still nervous as hell, but I know I won't ever get another chance like this. "Since the first time I ever saw you. The day you came to my rescue...I felt like I'd won the lottery or something. But seeing you with Bella tonight, it just reminded me that it's never going to happen. And that's okay. What I want more than anything is for you to be happy, Edward."

As he slowly closes the distance between us, I watch his eyes dart back and forth between mine. He approaches me like a wounded animal, each step deliberate and well thought out. His tongue darts out of his mouth to wet his lips and then he is right in front of me.

"What if I told you that what would make me happiest right now would be to kiss you?" he wonders. My breath catches in my throat as I watch his hand reach out to cup my cheek. "Say something," he whispers as his lips barely brush my heated skin. "Riley," he breathes, and then he presses his lips to mine.

Suddenly I am wrapping my arms around him and he is fisting the front of my shirt, pulling me as close as possible. We are lips and teeth and tongues and it is heaven.

I try not to think, to just enjoy the moment, because this may be the only chance I get to do this with him. Plunging my tongue in to his warm mouth, I pour all of my heart and soul into the kiss.

We kiss languidly, probing and teasing and tasting, and I don't want the moment to end. Eventually he starts to pull away from me, but he doesn't go far. Resting his forehead against my own, he tries to catch his breath before speaking.

"Bella...she and I...we're just friends, Riley."

I try to process the meaning of his words, but I'm not sure what he's trying to tell me. Taking my face in his hands, he kisses me once before continuing. "She knows how I feel about you. What you saw tonight? That was Bella telling me to 'go get my man.' "

"But I overheard you tell Jasper that we were just friends, nothing more." Had I misunderstood?

Edward sighs, and reaches down to take my hands. Lacing our fingers together, he pulls one of my hands to his mouth and kisses my knuckles tenderly.

"I did tell him that. I didn't know you were interested, Riley. If I had, I might have acted sooner."

I can feel a smile start to creep over my face as I realize exactly what he is telling me. He wants me, too.

"How long?" I ask as the crooked grin that I adore lights up his face.

"Since the first day you came to Forks High," he admits and I feel a pang of sadness for all the time that we have wasted.

"Hey," he says, lifting my chin so that he can see my face. "Don't be sad; we're here now, and that's what matters most."

Nodding, I pull him close again and snake my arms around his narrow waist, loving the feel of his warm body beneath my hands. "Hey Edward?" I ask.

"What, Ri?" he murmurs into my neck and I can't help but feel giddy as he places a tender kiss there.

"Is it okay if I kiss you again?" I ask.

He laughs and replies, "You'd better."

**...**

**Reviews are love!**


	2. Chapter 2

**This was recently featured on Twilighted's Friday Free For All. Hope you enjoy :)**

**And for those of you patiently waiting the next chapter of Til Summer, thank you for your continued support. I am slowly (it took me 2 months to write this o/s) getting back into my writing mojo after a very difficult (personally) holiday season. All the reviews, faves, alerts, etc. have meant alot, and rest assured, I AM working on the next chapter. The subject matter is very difficult in light of recent events in my life, but piece by piece it is slowly coming together.**

**Thanks to Naelany for providing the story prompt that inspired the original one-shot. Not sure if this is exactly what she had in mind when she said she wanted more from these two, but this is what came out! I hope she likes it, and I hope you all enjoy it as well! **

**Big thanks to OhJasperMyJasper for cheering me on, and offering her pre-reading skills! **

**EPOV**

Riley and I met in high school when his family moved to Forks at the beginning of our senior year. I was under his spell from the first time I laid eyes on his angelic face; his big brown eyes and full lips that were just begging to be kissed. And his smile- god, his smile could light up my world, yet he was completely oblivious to the effect he had on me.

Months went by with nothing more than a casual "hello" exchanged between us, but I continued to watch him. Watching and wanting, but too scared to let him know. It's not like I was hiding in the closet or anything; I had come out to my close friends at that point, and I was popular enough that no one else really cared. Even my parents were supportive.

But Riley was new and he didn't know me at all. It was obvious from his behavior that he was shy, too shy to ask anyone about me, even if he wanted to know one way or the other.

It wasn't until early March that things started to change. I came upon Riley being shoved around by a couple of juiced-up jocks who obviously had nothing better to do than pick on the shy new kid in the black-rimmed glasses.

God, I love those glasses.

Anyway, so I came to his rescue. I threatened them with Emmett, my very large best friend, if they didn't leave Riley alone. From that day on, I made sure to include him in everything. I drove him to and from school everyday, invited him to sit with me and my friends at lunch, and even started sitting beside him in the classes we shared.

I swear, how that boy never realized I was gay is _still_ unfathomable to me. I wanted him more than ever, but I wasn't sure what his feelings were for me. It took four more weeks (and a colossal misunderstanding about my date for the spring dance) for us to finally admit our true feelings to each other.

As far as declarations go, it was pretty spectacular. Standing under the stars of an unusually clear sky, we shared our first kiss on the beach at La Push.

We've been together ever since.

It was a stroke of luck that we both ended up at UW in the fall, as we had both been accepted for early decision. It took a lot of the pressure of 'what's going to happen when we leave for college?' off our shoulders so we could just enjoy our new relationship. And enjoy it we did.

I shared all my firsts with Riley, and he with me. My first real kiss, first hand-job, first _blow_ job, phone sex...fuck, Riley was great at phone sex. He'd call me late at night and whisper his dirtiest fantasies and sweet, loving words in my ear until we had both made a mess of our sheets. I never would have guessed that he would be so vocal, considering how shy and reserved he seemed when we first met. And when we did have actual sex for the first time, well, it was so much more than I had ever imagined.

Riley loved to get fucked. He was so responsive to my touch, moaning with pleasure anytime I got anywhere near his ass. Whether I used my fingers, my tongue, or my cock, he didn't care; he loved it all. But other than some rimming and the occasional finger-fuck during a blow job, Riley had never come anywhere near my ass, and I was starting to feel like I was really missing out on something.

Yeah. I wanted it bad.

We'd never really talked about switching, but I tried in every way I knew how to let him know I was open to the idea. Fuck, it felt so good when he played with my ass, there was no way I could keep those feelings to myself.

So, there we were. It was our anniversary; one year together. We were heading back to Forks the next day for spring break, but that night it would be just the two of us. Riley's roommate had left that morning, so he invited me to stay overnight in his dorm. Not like we never spent the night together, because we did...a lot. But to have an entire night to ourselves, with absolutely no interruptions was a novelty that we would definitely be taking advantage of.

Having spent the better part of the morning packing and loading my car for the trip home, I threw the few things I would need for the night into a small duffel, and headed out on foot for Riley's. We planned on ordering in dinner later on, so there was nothing else for me to worry about except getting to my boy.

It never failed to amaze me how breathtakingly beautiful he was. Even in his worn out jeans and plain, white button-down he looked utterly amazing. He pulled the door wide to allow me entrance, smiling brightly as he looked me up and down. "Hey there, gorgeous," he murmured as I dropped my bag on the floor and pulled him by his belt loops and placed a tender kiss on his lips.

"Hey baby. I missed you last night."

"Me too," he replied. "But you're here now, and we have the place to ourselves all night." With a devilish grin, he winked at me and said, "I have plans for you mister, so let's order some food so that we won't have to worry about it later on."

Riley called our favorite Japanese restaurant and ordered our usual while I rifled through his movie collection for something we could watch while we were waiting for our food. Even though it was extremely difficult to keep my hands to myself, somehow I managed to make it until the delivery guy had come and gone.

It didn't take long before we were back on the bed, a tangle of arms and legs as we kissed eachother more urgently than before.

"God, Riley...so hot, love you...can't wait to fuck you, babe," I mumbled as gently took his earlobe between my lips.

Laughing softly against the skin of my neck, he turned his head, traced his tongue around the rim of my ear and murmured, "I'm not the one who's getting fucked tonight, beautiful."

A shiver ran up my spine and a whispered "fuck" fell from my lips as my breathing began to accelerate.

"Would you like that, baby?" he asked teasingly. "Do you want to know what it feels like to have my cock pulsing deep inside your body?"

"Fuck. Yes." I growled. I wasn't sure what had changed that made him feel that he was finally ready to do this, but I sure wasn't going to do anything to deter him from his task.

I watched in amazed awe as he stood and slowly began to remove his clothing. As each article left his body, another piece of his flesh was revealed to me. His long lean torso, the dusting of light brown hair on his lower abdomen, the v of his hips that never failed to draw my attention to the most beautiful cock I had ever seen. I gasped as he pushed his jeans down over his narrow hips, revealing his erection, and licked my lips as a bead of precum appeared at his slit.

"Come here," I rasped, sitting upright on the edge of the bed and pulling him forward. Letting my tongue tease his slit, I wrapped a hand around his shaft as my other stroked the sensitive patch of skin just behind his balls. He groaned as I continued to work him over; tasting, touching, teasing until he finally had to remove himself from my grasp.

"Fuck, babe...you've gotta stop. I'm too close, and I want to do this right for you." It was the first time all night I had sensed any insecurity on his part. With my hands on his hips, I looked up into his soulful brown eyes and smiled.

"Do you remember our first time?" I asked playfully.

"What do you mean?" he laughed. "Of course I remember! It was right before we moved here to start school. It was the best, well, one of the best nights of my life so far." Smiling shyly, let his hands wander over my shoulders and took a step closer.

"Then you also remember how nervous I was; how I was so afraid I was going to hurt you that I turned into a bumbling idiot?"

"That's not quite how I remember it, but yeah, I remember," he answered quietly.

Encouraging him to sit on the bed beside me, I continued. "See, here's the thing: _this is us_, you know? It's going to be good, because it's you and me. I know you won't hurt me, and that you'll make it good because every bit of what's in your heart is gonna be driving you." He stared at me, a mix of emotions raging in his eyes.

"I love you, Edward. More than anything, I love you," he whispered reverently.

"I know you do, and I trust you. With my heart, with my body, with everything I have."

Moving to kneel in front of me, he took my lips in a heated kiss just as his fingers found their way under the edge of my shirt. Our lips parted only briefly as he peeled the offensive fabric off over my head. "Move back on the bed," he murmured as he popped the button on my jeans. His eyes followed my every move as I scooted back so my whole body was flat on the mattress, and only then did he begin to work my jeans and briefs over my hips.

Before I could take a breath, he was leaning over me, his body flush with mine and his tongue demanding entrance in my mouth. "I'm gonna do you so good, sweetheart. Wanna fuck you till you see stars."

"Yes...fuck...oh god," I babbled as he ground his growing erection against my rigid shaft.

"Turn over," I heard him whisper as he moved to the side to give me room to move. Rolling on to my stomach, my nerves did a flip-flop as I thought of what was about to happen. I should have known that Riley would take his damn sweet time getting around to the main attraction; not that I was complaining.

"Oh. My. Fuck." I growled as I felt the first swipe of his tongue over my sensitive flesh. "Shit, that feels so good!" Digging his fingers into my cheeks, he parted them forcefully and went to work teasing my entrance. Every circle and flick of his tongue sent shockwaves through my already overstimulated body. There were times when I thought I could come just on his tongue in my ass and be happy about it, but I was having none of that tonight. I had my eye on the prize.

"Fuck me, Riley. Please? God, I want to feel you in me."

A whimper escaped his lips, and I felt the bed shift as he reached over to retrieve some lube and a condom from his nightstand. The click of the bottle lid gave me a sharp warning just as slick fingers began to tease my hole. Slowly I felt my body give way to the intrusion, relaxing minutely as he added a second, and then a third finger, stretching and preparing me for himself.

Writhing on the bed, I cried out as his fingers brushed over my prostate, setting my body aflame with uncontrollable desire. "Now, Riley...oh God, please! I need you, baby!"

Somewhere in my incoherent state, I heard the tearing of the foil wrapper. I mourned the loss of his touch as he removed his fingers from my body to roll the condom over his swollen shaft. Lost in a state of ecstasy, I barely heard his whispered, "Are you ready for me, babe?"

"Yes," I sighed as I felt the head of his cock breach my opening. He paused then, allowing me to adjust to the burning stretch that I could feel from my ass all the way to the tips of my fingers and toes.

"You okay?" he asked, slowly rocking his hips back and forth as my body began to open to him.

Moaning softly, I arched my back and let him in until he was fully seated inside my body. "Yeah," I gasped. "Just...move. You can move. Just start slow, okay?"

I heard his breath catch as he gently pulled out until just the head of his dick was left inside, the ridge tugging on the ring of muscle at my opening. Together we set a steady rythym, a slow rolling of hips as his cock moved in and out, driving me closer and closer to the edge.

"Fuck Edward...so warm...never knew...love you, babe!" He picked up speed, his thrusting becoming more vigorous and powerful as his need escalated. "Oh shit! You're so fucking tight!"

"Yeah!" I cried out as he found that spot inside that lit me up. "Fuck me harder!"

I was pushing back to meet his every thrust now, lust and desire fueling the need to edge closer and closer to my climax. Want. Need. Pleasure. Ecstasy. Riley was driving me to the brink, with nowhere left for me to go but over the edge.

I wanted to wait for him, feel his cock swell and pulse as he filled the condom, but I was too far gone. "Oh shit! Fuck, Riley...gonna cum!"my body locked down, the muscles in my ass clamping tightly around Riley's cock as thick, creamy jets of white spurted out of my own dick and on to the bed beneath me. I never even touched myself and I was cumming all over the place like a pre-teen having a wet dream.

He followed close behind me, crying out as his erratic thrusting gave way to his release. "Oh God, oh God," he mumbled, collapsing with me on the bed in a sweaty tangle of limbs.

Barely able to lift my head, I laughed. "Wow. Why on Earth didn't we do that sooner?"

"I promise I won't make you wait another year," he smiled, relief in his eyes at my obvious enjoyment. "Happy Anniversary, baby."

"Happy Anniversary, love."


	3. Chapter 3

**Happy Birthday Naelany! You have been a great friend and mentor over the last year or so. You are always there when I need a prereader or beta, and you never fail to have a kind word when I'm in a funk. I know you love these boys as much as I do, and since the plot bunny that inspired the original one-shot was yours, I thought you might like to see Edward's take on the story!**

**I wish you the happiest of birthdays my dear! I adore you and treasure you! *muah***

**This is in drabble format, which seems to be the only way I can write these days. It is also un-beta'd, so please forgive and puncuation or grammatical errors :)**

**Standard disclaimers apply. I don't own, yadda, yadda, yadda.**

***~N~* *~N~* *~N~***

On any other day, the entire school would have been abuzz over the new kid. But this wasn't any other day; this was the day that Forks High's star quarterback showed up for school with a black eye, so the beautiful boy with the sandy hair and amber eyes went unnoticed.

Well, not completely. I, for one, could not tear my eyes away from his heavenly face, except to take in his long legs and lean body. It was as if the boy from my dreams had just walked through the door and was standing before me.

I stood, transfixed.

***N***

Months passed with little more than a hello exchanged between us, but my crush on him was greater than ever. We shared a few classes, giving me the opportunity to observe him on a daily basis.

I found his clumsiness endearing, his intelligence intoxicating. He never tried to draw attention to himself, but when called upon, he always knew the answer for whatever question he had been asked.

Unfortunately, this made him the target of a few of the more obnoxious bullies in our class. I struggled with the desire to help him. Would he let me if I offered?

***N***

It was by chance that I found him in the library, being pushed around by a couple of blockheads from the basketball team. I called them by name as I approached, warning them that they could get suspended from the team if they were caught bullying another student. How would they explain to their parents when they were barred from playoffs?

Luckily, that was all it took to get them to back off.

As Riley and I stood there staring at each other, I realized this was my chance.

"Would you like to have lunch with my friends and I?"

***N***

From that day on, he was a part of our group. My best friends all knew I was gay, and it was a non-issue with them, but I wasn't sure how Riley would feel about it. I was also fairly sure that Jasper and Bella knew about my growing feelings for our new friend, which was confirmed when I asked Bella to be my date for the upcoming dance.

"Isn't there someone else you wanted to ask?" she said, grinning. "Like a certain brown eyed hipster who's been following you around lately?"

Nervously, I stuttered, "I- I just can't. Please?"

***N***

As much as I wished for Riley to be my date, I wasn't willing to risk asking him. If he wasn't gay, he'd hate me, and if he was, well there was no guarantee that he would be interested in me that way.

Of course, Jasper was convinced I was wrong. "You have to have noticed how he looks at you Ed... it's like he wants to eat you, or something."

I tried to explain that Riley didn't like me that way, that he just needed a friend to lean on. Even to my own ears, the argument was weak.

***N***

At Bella's urging, I invited Riley to join us at the dance, and admittedly, I wanted him there. He was the one I wanted to put my arms around and sway to the music as I buried my face in the crook of his neck. I just couldn't tell him that.

It did not escape my notice that he grew distant as the week wore on. He said he didn't dance and that he'd just feel out of place, but I couldn't help but wonder if he saw how I felt for him. That it made him uncomfortable around me.

***N***

I asked him if I'd done something wrong, but he swore that he just wasn't feeling like himself. It was easy to see the defeat etched on his face, as if he'd been caught in a lie. I tried to brush off the hurt and disappointment, and once again tried to encourage him to change his mind and meet us at the dance.

For just a second, I swore I could see my own feelings reflected back as his eyes met mine, and I wondered if he saw the same.

With a quick nod, he climbed out of the car.

***N***

As we held court in the far corner of the gym, I tried not to get my hopes up. After all, he told me repeatedly that he wasn't coming, and I had no reason to believe otherwise. It was then that Bella spun around and threw her arms around me.

"He's here," she whispered, standing on tiptoe to kiss my cheek. "Now, go get your man!"

As I lifted my hand in greeting, I noticed the look of despair on his face. I started across the gym to meet him just as he turned and fled.

"Riley, wait!" I cried.

***N***

When I finally caught him in the parking lot, he wouldn't meet my eyes.

"I shouldn't have come," he whispered.

When I asked why not, he admitted that it hurt to see me with Bella. Finally, everything clicked in to place.

He thought I was with Bella. He wanted me.

It was time to tell him everything.

"Riley, please look at me," I implored. When he did, I asked him if we could go somewhere, knowing that this conversation would require as much privacy as we could manage.

"If you're sure you want to," he answered hesitantly.

"Please," I replied.

***N***

As I drove toward the beaches at La Push, he asked about Bella, wondering how she would get home. I assured him that she would find a ride with Alice and Jasper.

I parked my car in the space closest to the the trail head and got out, heading down toward the beach, knowing he would follow me.

When I reached the water's edge I turned, facing him as I asked, "You said it hurts you to see me with Bella. What does that mean?"

He placed his hand over his heart and said softly, "It means...it hurts here."

***N***

I let his words wash over me as he rambled on about my relationship with Bella and how happy we looked together. It wasn't until he said that he had wanted me for a long time that I felt shock.

I was dumbfounded. How much time had I wasted, pining for him when we could have been together?

I shook off those thoughts as relief flooded my soul. "You want me."

"Yes."

"Since when?" I wondered aloud, trying to read his expression.

"Since the first time I saw you."

***N***

Before I could say anything, he was rambling again. He knew we could only ever be friends and that was okay with him; that all he really wanted was my happiness.

I approached him slowly, fearing that I would scare him away if I moved too quickly. How could he not know that I had been craving his touch for months? That all I had ever wanted was for him to look at me the way he was looking at me just then.

"What if I told you that what would make me happiest right now would be to kiss you?"

Cupping his cheek, I brushed my lips against his jaw.

***N***

"Say something," I begged. Breathing his name, I pressed my lips against his tenderly.

His arms wrapped around me, I fisted his shirt and held him close against me as I plunged my tongue in to his eager mouth. I'm not sure how long we stayed like that, tasting and teasing and _loving_, before I had to pull away, needing air in my lungs.

Resting my forehead against his, I murmured, "Bella... she and I... we're just friends, Riley."

I took his face in my hands and kissed him once more, trying to find the words I needed to say.

***N***

"She knows how I feel about you," I spoke softly, sharing Bella's words at the dance.

His confusion was palpable as he relayed the conversation he had overheard between Jasper and myself. I could only tell him the truth.

"I didn't know you were interested, Riley. If I had, I might have acted sooner."

The happiness on his face when he learned that I wanted him soon disappeared and was replace by a look of sorrow as he realized how much time we had wasted. Although I had felt the same moments before, I wouldn't let him mourn the past.

***N***

Looking in to his eyes I murmured, "Hey, don't be sad; we're here now, and that's what matters most."

He wrapped his arms around my waist, holding me tightly, and whispered, "Hey Edward?"

"What, Ri?" I murmured against his neck, peppering him with tender kisses.

"Is it okay if I kiss you again?"

I smiled then, trying to hold in a laugh as the giddiness I felt began to bubble over. "You'd better."

Finally, after so many months of wanting and waiting, wishing and hoping, Riley Biers was all mine. My heart's deepest desire. I felt at home at last.

***~N~* *~N~* *~N~* *~N~***


End file.
